


Act I: Lost

by KitiaraM



Series: Kaja Hawke [1]
Category: Dragon Age
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-09
Updated: 2012-08-09
Packaged: 2017-11-11 19:06:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/481861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KitiaraM/pseuds/KitiaraM
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Intro for Kaja Hawke. First in timeline, not the first written.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Act I: Lost

Kaja stared up blankly through the barred hatch at the patch of blue sky. Finally, after all the storms…. They were packed in tightly in the hold, with hardly any room to move, but the captain wouldn’t allow any of the refugees on deck. It stank down here. After three weeks she should be used to it, but it just seemed to get worse every day. There was nothing to do but stare at the bulkheads. And think. She didn’t want to think.

Every time she closed her eyes she saw it again: Carver rushing forward, brash as always… the ogre slamming him into the ground. Her mother kneeling by his broken body, blaming her…. _Stop it_ , she remonstrated fiercely with herself, _you couldn’t have done anything_. 

She sighed, remembering how he had looked when he had told her he was joining King Cailan’s army, too. Defiant, trying not to show his nervousness. He’d always competed with her, always resented being the ‘little’ brother. Mother had not been happy, to say the least, but for once even she couldn’t talk him out of something. 

Well, she’d managed to get them out of the killing ground of Ostagar, get them both home. Only to run again, with Bethany and Mother in tow. And Carver sniping at her at every turn, like he always did. He could really be an annoying little prick…. Her eyes stung, and she let a tear fall. No one would see it down here anyway. 

A hand grasped hers and she opened her eyes to meet Aveline’s emerald gaze. Neither of them spoke, but the shared bond of loved ones lost connected them, and she squeezed back gratefully. 

She let her head fall back again. A gull crossed her little patch of sky and she wished with all her heart to **be** that bird. Free…. They had nothing; no home, no possessions, no money. She wondered what it would be like to live in a mansion, with servants and nice dresses…. 

Whatever came, she vowed, she wouldn’t fail her family again. 

*****

_ Have you ever been lost in a different world _

_ Where everything you once knew _

_ Is gone _

_ And you find yourself powerless _

_ With everything that exists _

_ You're numb _

_ Brian McFadden-Demons _

Kaja stared at the gigantic statues, the rusty chains as large as their ship, the imposing towers and walls that were her first sight of Kirkwall, and felt nothing. The Blight had swept away from them their home, their lives… everything they’d known. Her father had often said, when you don’t know what to do, just keep going, one step in front of the other. She’d been doing that for weeks. She couldn’t admit that she felt as lost as the rest of her family. They depended on her. She had to be strong.

As she listened to the guard refusing them entrance, her fists clenched. But she couldn’t fight the whole city; she could do nothing. 

When the fight broke out she welcomed the violence. At least she was _doing_ something. And perhaps it did sway the captain somewhat, enough to agree to send a message. And still they waited, in a little pocket of time and space that seemed endless. It was hot and crowded in the Gallows, and smelled of sweat and desperation. They simply… existed.

Gamlen’s arrival finally broke the waiting. Her initial relief quickly turned to dull despondency as he ‘explained’ the situation. It wasn’t much, but if it would get them into the city, give them something to start with….

One more step. 


End file.
